Well, what’s the point of making resolutions again for the new year if we could barely achieve what we resolved to do this very year?
Before we start beating ourselves for all the unachieved resolutions (if we could even remember half of them), let us be kinder to ourselves and stop all those negative thoughts from suffocating our mind. Oh, and did I mention mindfulness help?
My good friend Tracey Powell who’s been a great support of my blog put it this way “We always do our very best in each circumstance and there is no hindsight because circumstances change constantly and we are never in the exact same set of circumstances at any given moment ever again so we really need to try and lighten our own loads”
To be very frank I’ve never put down any written resolution ever. But this year it’s going to be slightly different. In order to keep myself on track, I’ll just highlight a few key areas in life that a little bit of extra mindfulness could probably make a big difference in 2018.
(After all, what’s the point of practicing mindfulness in meditation if we never really apply it in our life).
Here’s a list of some aspects of life where a degree of positive awareness could be really beneficial to us.
The ever happy family that you saw on TV? Some find it hard to replicate in real life. Others don’t have a family. So let’s be grateful if we have one, regardless of our perception of our family.
The fact is, there will always be conflicts of values, misunderstanding, arguments, or fights in families. The goal is not to have zero arguments, but mastering the skill of how to argue respectfully.
Let’s try to be more mindful that despite all these, there is true love beneath all the nagging, bickering and shouting match. Because anger is not the absence of love, but merely the opposite of the same coin.
Six packs abs? Or getting the perfect curves?
How about let’s start with eating healthier and getting a regular workout. And then we will talk about getting your ideal body shape.
If you think to cut that 60 minutes of work out so you have more time for productive work, soon you’ll spend more time visiting the doctors or pharmacy instead. It just doesn’t work that way.
Or if you are spending most of your time in front of a PC, do invest in a proper office chair as sitting with the incorrect posture could cause really serious, and I mean really, really serious damage to your spine.
(I remember my chiropractor mention something about slipped discs. Google that, it’s no laughing matter).
If you’re single heading into a new year, it is ok to remain single and attractively so.
But if you are blissfully attached, never take your partner for granted, especially when you believe that your relationship has matured.
Trust me, things can go horribly wrong even if you have 10, 20 or 30 years in your relationship or marriage if you are being complacent in it.
Think of your relationship as a blooming garden, ever lovely and beautiful. But stop all the care for a long time and you’ll see weeds growing and pest having a party in the garden.
Sometimes, it’s too late to call pest control. Most people Google “How to save a relationship” when it’s way too late.
Remember that a good relationship thrives on teamwork and good communication skills.
Do you follow your passion or the money trail?
Regardless of what you may read on the internet, passion doesn’t always turn into profit. And in the real world, money is a very useful tool to get you necessity in life.
And don’t get me started on the lack of happiness at the workplace as the sole reason to change your job or career. Because most of the unhappiness resulted from the unrealistic expectation.
As for being a superstar at the company overnight? Dream on. Success required hard works and loads of sacrifice.
Alright, I’ll stop ranting but if you are a Gen-Y or Millenial and you felt offended, read this for a reality check and before you asked, I’m a Gen-Y.
Take some time to be very clear about your goals and values before making any rash decision.
I can’t stress how much entrepreneurs have been over glamorized in recent years to the point of it is almost a sin not being an entrepreneur.
But if you are quitting your paying job and starting some crazy idea just because you want to have more free time and hated working with a boss, you’re in for a rude shock.
Not even desiring to be rich is a good enough excuse to start a business.
Look deeper into what value your business is providing into a society and how does it stand out from the competitors.
If you can’t answer what differentiate your business, you are running out of business. (Harsh advice that I ignore once to my own peril)
Money or happiness? What is more important?
If you are answering either one of them, you are subconsciously telling yourself that you can only have one without the other.
Money is a tool, just like a hammer is to a carpenter. It is neither good nor evil.
Money is only as important when it is serving you. Money doesn’t buy you happiness. But it does buy you foods, clothes, shelters, and all the things that you have right now.
And trust me, being poor doesn’t make you happy either. There is nothing noble about being poor.
Be mindful of your thoughts especially your subconscious beliefs about money. It will determine how you fare as long as money is concern. You can’t attract what you negate.
The problem is you think you have time.
We naturally take for granted that we are going to live to the ripe old age where the fact is every single day we wake up and breathe is a miracle worthy of our gratitude.
Let’s really say goodbye to procrastination this year. It’s the only chance for anything that smells like success to happen.
It can be awfully tough to get rid of this bad habit. But that is the price to pay for a truly meaningful change in life.
What has having fun got to do with achieving your new year resolutions?
Try flashing back to your childhood and recall how your imagination runs free then. Creativity comes naturally when there are no boundaries.
And as we grow up, we start setting up limits for ourselves, trying to do the ‘right’ thing or being ‘normal’. In doing so, we limit our creativity and caged our spirit and yet we wonder why adults don’t believe in magic.
Take a break, have some good old fun that really break the routine of your life. It doesn’t matter if you’re going to sky-dive or bungee jump.
You’ll be amazed how this would give you the strength to face hardship with a smile. Just be aware that you need to have fun too.
Or rather, be mindful of your subconscious beliefs that are not supportive or sabotaging your success. Beliefs like “Money is the root of all evil”, “Rich people are greedy”, “I‘m not good enough” or “I can’t trust people“.
You may not recall thinking these out loud. But if they are in your subconscious mind, I can assure you that they are affecting every single action or decision you made.
Is the subconscious mind really that powerful?
Well, there’s an actual study that our subconscious mind actually prepared to react to a situation before we are even consciously aware of it. Check this very interesting article here.
Even the strongest of us could break at times. And I’m talking about the state of our mind. It is easy to slip into anxiety and depression without us really noticing it.
You need to relax your mind before it goes into a negative spiral. It is easier to prevent than cure.
While we you still here with a positive mindset, do try meditation regardless of the style. Any meditation is better than no meditation.
As for me, mindfulness meditation has been very useful.
Or if you wanted to try something different but equally effective, hypnosis is the name. It’s perfectly safe and relaxing. And it has nothing with mind control or being put to sleep with a swinging watch.
I wrote this post in the hope it could serve me a great reminder in this coming year. But if you find it helpful, do share around with your friends.
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I am an engineer-turned-writer who once struggle with social anxiety. After overcoming problems inflicted by low self-esteem and the fear of interaction, I realize the need for taking a holistic approach in developing our mind. I'm sharing my experience, remedies, and techniques that interest me in my quest to be a better self.
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